miriam margolyes book tour

Miriam Margolyes

A BAFTA award-winning actress, Miriam is known internationally for her many screen and stage roles including Harry Potter, Romeo + Juliet and more...

• Jun 08 Sat East Molesey, Hampton Court Palace Miriam Margolyes & Friends: What the Dickens! View Tickets
• Jul 02 Tue Manchester, Bridgewater Hall Miriam Margolyes View Tickets
• Jul 05 Fri London, Eventim Apollo Miriam Margolyes - Oh Miriam! Live View Tickets
• Jul 12 Fri Bristol Beacon Oh Miriam! Live Miriam Margolyes View Tickets
• Jul 24 Wed Douglas, Villa Marina & Gaiety Theatre Complex Miriam Margolyes View Tickets
• Jul 26 Fri Glasgow, SEC Miriam Margolyes - Oh Miriam! Live View Tickets

Fans who like Miriam Margolyes also like

Dawn French

Gyles Brandreth

Brian Blessed

Jenny Eclair

• News & Reviews
• Tours & Tickets

Miriam Margolyes has announced her biggest tour yet to mark the launch of her new book. 

The BAFTA-winning actress, and one of the UK's most loved and most outspoken national treasures, will visit theatres and concerts halls across the UK and Ireland next September and October. Tickets go on general sale at 10am on December 2. She said:

"My new book is called OH MIRIAM! - something that has been said to me a lot over the years (often in tones of strong disapproval) and it contains lots more revelations and stories and discoveries and I can’t wait to share it with you all."

Miriam Margolyes Upcoming Tour Dates are as follows

Sat September 16 2023 - NOTTINGHAM Royal Concert Hall Mon September 18 2023 - BIRMINGHAM Symphony Hall Tue September 19 2023 - LONDON Palladium Thu September 21 2023 - CARDIFF St Davids Hall Sat September 23 2023 - NEWCASTLE UPON TYNE O2 City Hall Tue September 26 2023 - NORTHAMPTON Royal and Derngate Fri September 29 2023 - OXFORD New Theatre Sun October 01 2023 - BRIGHTON Dome Tue October 03 2023 - SOUTHEND Cliffs Pavilion Fri October 06 2023 - GLASGOW SEC Armadillo Sat October 07 2023 - EDINBURGH Usher Hall Tue October 10 2023 - SHEFFIELD City Halls Wed October 11 2023 - MANCHESTER Lowry Fri October 13 2023 - LIVERPOOL Philharmonic Sun October 15 2023 - HARROGATE HCC Mon October 16 2023 - YORK Barbican Wed October 18 2023 - PORTSMOUTH Guildhall Thu October 19 2023 - POOLE Lighthouse Fri October 20 2023 - PLYMOUTH Pavilions Mon October 30 2023 - DUBLIN Bord Gais Energy Theatre Tue October 31 2023 - BELFAST Waterfront Hall

Compare & Buy Miriam Margolyes Tickets at Stereoboard.com.

Related News

Miriam Margolyes Tour Dates

13 upcoming shows

Join Our Mailing List

Be the first to know with news & latest shows

Sorry, there has been an error. Please retry .

Thank you for signing up to the Mailing List

Miriam Margolyes Oh Miriam! Live 2024

Miriam margolyes.

After the success of her sell-out 2023 tour, Miriam Margolyes  returns with more juicy, jaw-dropping stories from her eventful life and career to celebrate the paperback release of her bestselling and much acclaimed book, Oh Miriam!

Buckle up for an irrepressible, hilarious and moving evening as Miriam shares some of her favourite anecdotes and divulges never-told-before stories and life lessons. From declaring her love to Vanessa Redgrave to being fed cockroaches by Steve Buscemi, from turnip-based comedy with Blackadder to being farted on by Arnold Schwarzenegger, from Graham Norton's sofa to Alan Cumming's camper van, Miriam’s life has been (and continues to be) an uproarious adventure.

As one of the most recognisable actresses, and now Vogue cover star, Miriam has charmed audiences across TV and film for over sixty years, earning her a special place in our hearts. As Stephen Fry aptly put it, ‘There is no one on earth quite so wonderful as Miriam Margolyes’.  

Reliably outrageous and always entertaining, join Miriam in conversation for a riotous evening as full of life and surprises as the actress herself.

Every ticket comes with a paperback copy of Oh Miriam!  (RRP £10.99)  

The livestream of the event at The Bristol Beacon is now available to watch on demand until 26th July 2024.

The event at Eventim Apollo will have a British Sign Language (BSL) Interpreter 

• DATES, VENUES & TIMES

Royal & Derngate, Northampton

WAITING LIST

The Bridgewater Hall, Manchester

Eventim Apollo, London

The Marlowe, Canterbury

Cambridge Corn Exchange

Mayflower Theatre, Southampton

Bristol Beacon

View All Streaming Options

BOOK STREAM

Ipswich Regent Theatre

Symphony Hall, Birmingham

Wales Millennium Centre, Cardiff

Villa Marina, Isle of Man

SEC, Glasgow

Music Hall, Aberdeen

• Moscow concerts Moscow concerts Moscow concerts See all Moscow concerts ( Change location ) Today · Next 7 days · Next 30 days
• Most popular artists worldwide
• Trending artists worldwide

• Tourbox for artists

Search for events or artists

• Sign up Log in

• Get the app
• Moscow concerts
• Change location
• Popular Artists
• Live streams
• Deutsch Português
• Popular artists

Miriam Margolyes

• On tour: no
• Upcoming 2024 concerts: none

160 fans get concert alerts for this artist.

Join Songkick to track Miriam Margolyes and get concert alerts when they play near you.

Find your next concert

Join 160 fans getting concert alerts for this artist

Past concerts

Hamer Hall, Arts Centre

Festival Theatre

Liverpool Philharmonic Hall

View all past concerts

Find out more about Miriam Margolyes tour dates & tickets 2024-2025

Want to see Miriam Margolyes in concert? Find information on all of Miriam Margolyes’s upcoming concerts, tour dates and ticket information for 2024-2025.

Unfortunately there are no concert dates for Miriam Margolyes scheduled in 2024.

Songkick is the first to know of new tour announcements and concert information, so if your favorite artists are not currently on tour, join Songkick to track Miriam Margolyes and get concert alerts when they play near you, like 160 other Miriam Margolyes fans.

• Most popular charts
• API information
• Brand guidelines
• Community guidelines
• Terms of use
• Privacy policy
• Cookies settings
• Cookies policy

Get your tour dates seen everywhere.

• But we really hope you love us.

How to get tickets to Miriam Margolyes's 2023 UK live tour

Miriam Margolyes is heading on tour throughout the UK in the autumn of 2023. Here's how to get your hands on tickets.

• Imogen Hope
• Share on facebook
• Share on twitter
• Share on pinterest
• Share on reddit
• Email to a friend

If you enjoy stories from the world of showbiz, laughing until tears roll down your face and the feeling of not quite knowing what's going to happen next, then you're in for a treat – Miriam Margolyes is heading on a tour of the UK and Ireland next year.

The BAFTA award-winning actor is perhaps equally beloved for her off-screen appearances as her on-screen ones. Margolyes started her acting career as a member of the infamous Cambridge Footlights while at university, whose other famous alumni include Hugh Laurie , Dame Emma Thompson and Stephen Fry .

Her career has spanned over four decades on stage and screen, where she's played iconic roles like Professor Sprout in the Harry Potter series, the Nurse in Baz Luhrmann's Romeo + Juliet and Madame Morrible in the original cast of the musical Wicked in the West End .

Over the past few years, Margolyes has become beloved not only for her acting, but for her frankness in interviews. While doing press for her last book on The Graham Norton Show, she famously said she'd only written it because she "was paid an enormous amount of money". More recently, she hit the headlines for swearing live on air on Radio 4's Today Programme.

This tour is to mark the release of a new book by Margolyes, Oh Miriam! , which contains stories about her life and work. The shows will be in conversation with Margolyes, and promise to be, in her signature style, delightfully hilarious and more than a bit outrageous.

More like this

Here are all the details on when Miriam Margolyes's live tour is taking place, plus how to get tickets.

Buy tickets to see Miriam Margolyes on tour in 2023 from Ticketmaster

Miriam Margolyes tour 2023: what are the UK dates and venues

Margolyes is touring throughout the UK and Ireland in September and October next year.

Here is the full list of dates and venues:

• 16th September 2023 — Royal Concert Hall, Nottingham
• 18th September 2023 — Birmingham Symphony Hall, Birmingham
• 19th September 2023 — London Palladium, London
• 21st September 2023 — St David's Hall, Cardiff
• 23rd September 2023 —O2 City Hall, Newcastle
• 26th September 2023 — Royal and Derngate, Northampton
• 29th September 2023 — New Theatre, Oxford
• 1st October 2023 — Brighton Dome, Brighton
• 3rd October 2023 — Cliffs Pavilion, Southend-on-Sea
• 6th October 2023 — SEC Armadillo, Glasgow
• 7th October 2023 — Usher Hall, Edinburgh
• 10th October 2023 — City Halls, Sheffield
• 11th October 2023 — The Lowry, Manchester
• 13th October 2023 — Liverpool Philharmonic Hall, Liverpool
• 15th October 2023 — HCC, Harrogate
• 16th October 2023 — Barbican, York
• 18th October 2023 — Guildhall, Portsmouth
• 19th October 2023 — Lighthouse, Poole
• 20th October 2023 — Pavilions, Plymouth
• 30th October 2023 — Bord Gais Energy Theatre, Dublin
• 31st October 2023 — Waterfront Hall, Belfast

Miriam Margolyes tour 2023: when do tickets go on sale?

General sale tickets for Miriam Margolyes's 2023 live tour go on sale on Friday 2nd December at 10am.

There is also the option to buy tickets on presale from 10am on Thursday 1st December for most venues, if you want to make absolutely sure you get to see Margolyes.

If you're after more advice on buying tickets online, read our guide to beating the Ticketmaster queue .

You can also pre-order Miriam Margolyes's new book Oh Miriam!: Stories from an Extraordinary Life – out 14th September 2023.

Check out our Going Out section to keep up with all the latest ticket releases. We've got it all, from our guide to get The Weeknd 2023 tour tickets , to the latest information on when the theatre adaptation of Little Life is coming to the West End.

Subscribe to Radio Times

Try 10 issues for just £10!

Transform your later life

Unlock the cash tied up in your home to pay off debts or help your family, says Paul Lewis. Get the free guide written by Paul Lewis

The best TV and entertainment news in your inbox

Sign up to receive our newsletter!

By entering your details, you are agreeing to our terms and conditions and privacy policy . You can unsubscribe at any time.

MIRIAMMARGOLYES.COM

"my online portfolio is a resource for directors and producers who might wish to sample my work. i've provided some clips from my films & audio books. should you require more details or even want to check my availability, do not hesitate for a second: contact my agents at once", future events, oh miriam uk paperback release date 4th july 2024 28th february 2024, oh miriam - live uk tour 1st - 27th july 2024 28th february 2024, margolyes & dickens:  the best bits -  edinburgh fringe 7th - 15th august 2024 28th february 2024.

See all future events »

• My Account My Account

Miriam Margolyes: Oh Miriam! Live

Reliably outrageous and always entertaining, join Miriam in conversation for a riotous evening.

After the success of her sell-out 2023 tour, Miriam Margolyes returns with more, juicy, jaw-dropping stories from her eventful life and career to celebrate the paperback release of her bestselling and much acclaimed book, Oh Miriam! Stories From An Extraordinary Life .

Buckle up for an irrepressible, hilarious and moving evening as Miriam shares some of her favourite anecdotes and divulges never told before stories and life lessons.

From declaring her love to Vanessa Redgrave to being fed cockroaches by Steve Buscemi, from Turnip based comedy with Blackadder to being farted on by Arnold Schwarzenegger, from Graham Norton’s sofa to Alan Cumming’s camper van, Miriam’s life has been (and continues to be) an uproarious adventure.

As one of the most recognisable actresses, and now Vogue cover star, Miriam has charmed audiences across TV and film for over sixty years, earning her a special place in our hearts. As Stephen Fry aptly put it, ‘There is no one on earth quite so wonderful as Miriam Margolyes.’

Every ticket comes with a paperback copy of Oh Miriam! RRP £10.99.

Recommended 14yrs+

Betteridge & Milsom

I am happy for The Marlowe to contact me about future events and activities by:

Website navigation

Miriam Margolyes

11 July 2024

Limited Availability

Page Navigation

Event details.

After the success of her sell-out 2023 tour, Miriam Margolyes returns with more, juicy, jaw-dropping stories from her eventful life and career to celebrate the paperback release of her bestselling and much acclaimed book,  Oh Miriam! Stories from an Extraordinary Life.

Buckle up for an irrepressible, hilarious and moving evening as Miriam shares some of her favourite anecdotes and divulges never-told-before stories and life lessons.

From declaring her love to Vanessa Redgrave to being fed cockroaches by Steve Buscemi, from turnip-based comedy with  Blackadder  to being farted on by Arnold Schwarzenegger, from Graham Norton’s sofa to Alan Cumming’s camper van, Miriam’s life has been (and continues to be) an uproarious adventure.

As one of the most recognisable actresses, and now  Vogue  cover star, Miriam has charmed audiences across TV and film for over sixty years, earning her a special place in our hearts. As Stephen Fry aptly put it, ‘ There is no one on earth quite so wonderful as Miriam Margolyes ’.

Reliably outrageous and always entertaining, join Miriam in conversation for a riotous evening as full of life and surprises as the actress herself.

Every ticket comes with a paperback copy of ‘Oh Miriam! RRP £10.99

Theatre — Mayflower Theatre

There are no discounts available

Running Time

Approx. 1 hr 50 mins including an interval

Recommended for ages 14+

No under 2’s allowed

This show will contain strong language

May contain haze effects

This event takes place at

Mayflower theatre.

Commercial Road, Southampton, SO15 1GE  

Street level access to our foyer & Box Office is through the main entrance on Commercial Road.

VIP Experiences

Add some sparkle to your Mayflower experience and celebrate a special event in style. Get friends together or treat loved ones and upgrade your show tickets.

You might also enjoy

Stitches comedy club, rhod gilbert & the giant grapefruit.

You are using an outdated browser. Please upgrade your browser to improve your experience.

LW Theatres

• Gold Experiences
• The Wizard of Oz
• LW Theatres & War Child

Miriam Margolyes: Oh Miriam! Live

FINAL CURTAIN CALL This show is no longer running at The London Palladium.

Join us on another unforgettable adventure through the extraordinary life and strong opinions of Miriam Margolyes, live on stage in her biggest tour yet to mark the launch of her new book.

“My new book is called OH MIRIAM! – something that has been said to me a lot over the years (often in tones of strong disapproval) – and it contains lots more revelations and stories and discoveries and I can’t wait to share it with you all”.

BAFTA-winning actor, voice of everything from  Monkey  to the Cadbury’s Caramel Rabbit, creator of a myriad of unforgettable characters from Lady Whiteadder to Professor Sprout, Miriam is one of the most recognisable actresses working today.

From being escorted off the Today programme (for saying what we were all thinking) to declaring her love to Vanessa Redgrave; from Tales of the Unexpected to Graham Norton’s sofa, she is our most loved and most outspoken national treasure – and Oh Miriam! takes you both inside her head and her heart.

Reliably outrageous and always entertaining, join Miriam, in conversation, for a riotous evening as full of life and surprises as the actress herself.

‘There is no one on earth quite so wonderful as Miriam Margolyes’ Stephen Fry

Audience responses from 2021 tour

‘If you’re thinking of going, do it!’

“Amazing, funny, sweet, kind, a lovely person – even if she is very, very rude.”

“The way she tells her stories…I could listen to her talk for hours.”

“One of best things I’ve ever seen. There is nothing better than an inspiring chat with an intelligent interviewer.”

EVENT INFORMATION

TICKETS Prices displayed include an online per ticket booking fee. All prices include a £1.70 restoration levy.

Please note that every ticket comes with a hardback copy of Oh Miriam! .

TIMES 18:30 – Doors 19:30 – Act One 20:15 – Interval 20:35 – Act Two 21:20 – Show ends

Our range of experiences are perfect for special occasions like birthdays, family celebrations, or a treat for yourself. Simply take a look through our extra-special offers, pick the experience that’s perfect for you, and we’ll take care of the rest.

The prices below do not include the price of the seat ticket. 

Private Bar Access

• Queue jump on arrival at The London Palladium
• Reserved table 1 hour pre-show and during interval
• Pre-show and interval drinks
• Savoury bar snacks

Available to book with your tickets

 Alcohol can only be served to and consumed by persons aged 18 years and over. Please ask a member of staff for details about any food allergens. Please drink responsibly.

Book Lounge Access

• Access to an exclusive bar 1 hour pre-show
• Pre-show and interval Champagne*
• Complimentary cloakroom

 *Alternative drinks available. Alcohol can only be served to and consumed by persons aged 18 years and over. Please ask a member of staff for details about any food allergens. Please drink responsibly. 

Book a Private Suite

• Exclusive access to one of our private suites for you and your guests during pre-show, and interval where applicable
• Dedicated Red Coat to assist throughout

Available to book with the hospitality team

*Alternative drinks available.  Alcohol can only be served to and consumed by persons aged 18 years and over. Please ask a member of staff for details about any food allergens. Please drink responsibly. Accessibility Information: Please note, we regrettably cannot provide step-free access to our private suites. Please contact the Hospitality team for further details.

Sign Up to Our Mailing List

Never miss a beat.

Want to be the first to know all things live music, comedy and entertainment? Want to get the latest news, updates and presales? Sign up to our mailing list and never miss a beat.

The London Palladium Access Tickets

Access bookings.

Are you an access customer? Find out how to sign up to our access scheme to get your tickets for Concerts and Events at The London Palladium.

FIND OUT MORE

Plan Your Visit to The London Palladium

Plan your visit.

Why not start planning your day to make sure your time with us at The London Palladium is as smooth as possible?

More information for your visit

Back to top

Tell your friends about this show

Send someone a hint .

Have you been very good this year? Then help your Santa out and drop them a hint for your perfect gift.

• Friends first name
• Friends last name
• Friends email address
• I'd love to see... 42nd Street Matilda School of Rock

Search LW Theatres

Hit enter to search or ESC to close

Our Theatres

• Eat & Drink
• Get Creative

Wed 11 October

Miriam Margolyes - Oh Miriam! Live

Join us on another unforgettable adventure through the extraordinary life and strong opinions of Miriam Margolyes, live on stage in her biggest tour yet to mark the launch of her new book.

“My new book is called OH MIRIAM! – something that has been said to me a lot over the years (often in tones of strong disapproval) – and it contains lots more revelations and stories and discoveries and I can’t wait to share it with you all”.

BAFTA-winning actor, voice of everything from Monkey to the Cadbury’s Caramel Rabbit, creator of a myriad of unforgettable characters from Lady Whiteadder to Professor Sprout, Miriam is one of the most recognisable actresses working today.

From being escorted off the Today programme (for saying what we were all thinking) to declaring her love to Vanessa Redgrave; from Tales of the Unexpected to Graham Norton’s sofa, she is our most loved and most outspoken national treasure – and Oh Miriam! takes you both inside her head and her heart.

Reliably outrageous and always entertaining, join Miriam, in conversation, for a riotous evening as full of life and surprises as the actress herself.

‘There is no one on earth quite so wonderful as Miriam Margolyes’ – Stephen Fry

Please note that every £55 ticket comes with a hardback copy of Oh Miriam!

Audience responses from 2021 tour

‘If you’re thinking of going, do it!’

“Amazing, funny, sweet, kind, a lovely person – even if she is very, very rude.”

“The way she tells her stories…I could listen to her talk for hours.”

“One of best things I’ve ever seen. There is nothing better than an inspiring chat with an intelligent interviewer.”

EAT & DRINK

Coming soon, spring season, how to find us.

Jump to navigation

Corn Exchange

• Folk festival
• City Events
• Cambridge Live Tickets
• The Guildhall
• What's on
• Sponsorship
• Spring/Summer 2024
• Gift Vouchers
• Information for Customers with Disabilities and Access Requirements
• Privacy Policy

Miriam Margolyes: Oh Miriam! Live

Buy Tickets

Buckle up for an irrepressible, hilarious and moving evening as Miriam shares some of her favourite anecdotes and divulges never-told-before stories and life lessons.

From declaring her love to Vanessa Redgrave to being fed cockroaches by Steve Buscemi, from turnip-based comedy with Blackadder to being farted on by Arnold Schwarzenegger, from Graham Norton's sofa to Alan Cumming's camper van, Miriam’s life has been (and continues to be) an uproarious adventure.

As one of the most recognisable actresses, and now Vogue cover star, Miriam has charmed audiences across TV and film for over sixty years, earning her a special place in our hearts. As Stephen Fry aptly put it, ‘There is no one on earth quite so wonderful as Miriam Margolyes’.

Reliably outrageous and always entertaining, join Miriam in conversation for a riotous evening as full of life and surprises as the actress herself.

Every ticket comes with a paperback copy of ‘Oh Miriam! RRP £10.99

Local arts needs local journalism. Donate to InReview today.

Oh Miriam! The extraordinary Margolyes is at it again!

Expect the unexpected with Miriam Margolyes, who is hitting the road with a tour of Australia in a new show in which she promises there will be no singing or dancing.

There are things you expect in a Miriam Margolyes interview that wouldn’t normally come up in polite conversation. Which is part of her charm, I guess.

Flatulence is one of them. Yes, you heard right.

I try to get it out of the way early in the piece. Her response?

“I’m just farting now,” Margolyes says. This is a phone interview but I’m assuming she’s joking. Or is she?

This British-Australian actor is a raconteur who is known to say things that shock us with the sweetest smile on her face. She has a new book out and is about to embark on a tour with a new show too. Miriam Margolyes: Oh Miriam! Live kicks off in New Zealand on March 11 before heading to Perth, Adelaide, Melbourne, Brisbane, Canberra and Newcastle.

What should we expect in her show?

“Oh, I don’t know if I would call it a show,” Margolyes says. “It’s a conversation between me and the interlocutor and the audience. Don’t expect any singing or dancing. There might be some clips of things I’ve done. I just come on, sometimes with the aid of a wheelchair, and I talk and hopefully the people will buy my book.”

It’s all about the book, Oh Miriam! Stories from an Extraordinary Life (Hachette Australia: $34.99).

“I don’t read the reviews but I read the balance sheets and a lot of people have already bought it,” she says. “I’m not a writer though, I’m just a lucky old lady who people have seen on television. I’m potty mouthed, I tell salacious and honest stories about what I’m like. It’s a window into Miriam Margolyes, a slightly dirty window.”

How would you describe her? Well, in her own words … “I’m lesbian, I’m short, I’m fat, I’m Jewish, I’m Dickensian.”

Which brings up the subject of Dickens, something she loves to talk about.  Her 1989 one-woman show Dickens Women was a huge hit.

I mention I have recently re-read A Christmas Carol and she agrees that it is a superb book. “Did you see the movie about Dickens, The Man Who Invented Christmas ?” I ask.

“See it? Darling, I was in it,” she says.

How embarrassing. I quickly Google it and, yes, of course, she plays Mrs Fisk. I had forgotten it was her because she has been in so many things one forgets the last time one saw her. She’s rather ubiquitous and has been on the Graham Norton Show so many times even she has lost count.

Now 82, she has had a rich and varied career. After studies at Cambridge University, she started out in theatre, making her film debut in the British comedy A Nice Girl Like Me in 1969. She has appeared in numerous other films including   Little Shop of Horrors, Romeo + Juliet  and a string of other films and is known for her voice work in films such as Babe and Happy Feet.

On television she has appeared in Blackadder (she was hilarious playing several roles in that series) and has also starred in Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries, Call the Midwife and other programs.

Margolyes  has charmed audiences across TV and film for more than 60 years, including in her adopted Australia. (Her partner, academic Heather Sutherland is Australian, they have a house here and Margolyes became an Australian citizen in 2013.)

Her popular ABC-TV documentary series’  Miriam Margolyes: Almost Australian and Australia Unmasked introduced her to a wider audience.

You may have seen her more recently on ABC-TV in two series of Miriam and Alan: Lost in Scotland, a series of hilarious road trips featuring Margolyes and Scottish comic Alan Cumming.

Cumming is constantly amused and bemused by his companion. It’s worth watching the clip-on YouTube to see Margolyes eating a whole raw onion as they motor along. The look of shock and incomprehension on Cumming’s face is the sort of response many have to Margolyes.

You never quite know what to expect. I guess it’s a case of expect the unexpected.

There will, she promises, be another of her Australian TV series soon with her exploring several regions including an episode where she ranges through the Byron Bay region.

“I loved it there,” she says. “In Byron Bay I steamed my yoni.”

Get InReview in your inbox – free each Saturday. Local arts and culture – covered.

Thanks for signing up to the InReview newsletter.

I am not about to explain exactly what she means by that but will leave you, dear reader, to look it up.

Miriam Margolyes: Oh Miriam! Live is touring nationally, with dates including the Festival Theatre in Adelaide (March 20) and the Concert Hall, QPAC, Brisbane (March 24). 

fane.com.au

Support local arts journalism

Your support will help us continue the important work of InReview in publishing free professional journalism that celebrates, interrogates and amplifies arts and culture in South Australia.

You must attribute the author and note prominently that the article was originally published by InReview .   You must also inlude a link to InReview . Please note that images are not generally included in this creative commons licence as in most cases we are not the copyright owner. However, if the image has an InReview photographer credit or is marked as “supplied”, you are free to republish it with the appropriate credits.

We recommend you set the canonical link of this content to https://inreview.com.au/inreview/theatre/2024/03/04/oh-miriam-the-extraordinary-margolyes-is-at-it-again/ to insure that your SEO is not penalised.

This article is republished from InReview under a Creative Commons licence. Read the original article .

InReview is an open access, non-profit arts and culture journalism project. Readers can support our work with a donation . Subscribe to InReview’s free weekly newsletter here .

Today's top stories

More Theatre stories

Just for laughs ... when we need them most

Theatre review: The Wharf Revue – Pride in Prejudice

Let's get physical! The return of cult classic Closer

Theatre review: The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time

• International edition
• Australia edition
• Europe edition

Miriam Margolyes: ‘I don’t just want to be a foul-mouthed old biddy’

She may be our naughtiest national treasure, but Miriam Margolyes still wants to be admired for her acting. She talks about the joy of later-life fame and the many men – from Jagger to Beatty to Schwarzenegger – who have appalled her

I t took Miriam Margolyes 80 years to write her memoir. Two years on, the actor, documentarian and raconteur extraordinaire has written another – of sorts. Whereas This Much Is True was a (relatively) conventional autobiography, Oh Miriam! is more of a self-help guide: Margolyes’s manifesto for a fulfilled life. Why did she feel the need to write it? “I have to say the reason I did it is exactly the same reason I did the first one. They made me an offer I couldn’t refuse.” An advance of £250,000, seeing as you’re asking. “I didn’t particularly want to do it. But I thought I cannot turn down such a huge amount of money because I’m going to need it for carers. So I wrote it.”

Margolyes loves to tell it straight. And the older she gets, the straighter she tells it. She’s also famously filthy – perhaps most memorably telling the story, on Graham Norton’s show in 2011, of how, when riding her bike as a student in Cambridge, she stopped at the traffic lights by an open car with an American soldier inside. “Something crazy took hold of me. You know that feeling. And I said, ‘Would you like to follow me to my college and I’ll suck you off?’” Sure enough, he followed. And very grateful he was, too. “‘Can I come back next week and bring my friends?’ he asked as he left.” What makes her so funny is that she tells these stories in a cut-glass, upper-class RP – every magnificently enunciated syllable sharp as a stab.

She’s worried that Oh Miriam! is a little strait-laced. “I don’t think it’s as rude as my first book, therefore I suspect it won’t do as well. But I think the things I say in it are again absolutely true, and perhaps more serious. And I’m glad of that. I don’t just want to be a foul-mouthed old biddy. A potty-mouth as I’m often called. Because I’m more than that.”

It’s true. She is more than that. But she’s also worrying unnecessarily. With chapter titles such as The Joy of Bottoms, Adventures in Heavy Petting and Always Be a Cunt, I tell her fans of mucky Miriam are unlikely to feel short-changed. “Hehehe! Good, because that’s part of who I am.” And now, she says, is hardly the time to start holding back, whether it’s on Israel and Palestine, the Tories and Labour, Warren Beatty and Mick Jagger, or circumcision and smegma – just a few of the topics we touch on over the next couple of hours.

“What can I do? I have to say what I believe to be the truth,” she says. “Now I’m 82, I don’t give a flying fuck. If I want to say something, I’m going to say it.” At 72 or 62, would she have given one? “Oh no . I’ve always been like this. The only time I’ve been moderate with expressing myself is when I was in America because my adorable Jewish agent said [she adopts a male, nasal, Jewish-New Yorker voice], ‘Miriam, you’re in America now, you can’t talk about being gay and all that stuff, just button up and don’t wear shorts.’” She did button up, hid the true Margolyes, and she failed – her 1992 TV series Frannie’s Turn was cancelled after five episodes.

There is one other time I remember Margolyes being moderate with her expletives – on Desert Island Discs in 2008. Back then, Margolyes was a successful character actor and a regular in costume dramas such as Vanity Fair and Little Dorrit. There were also legendary cameos (Lady Whiteadder and Infanta Maria Escalosa in Blackadder), appearances in the Harry Potter films as Professor Sprout and moments of true glory (a best supporting actress Bafta for Martin Scorsese’s The Age of Innocence in 1994). She has a fabulous gift for accents, voicing everything from animated movies (the border collie Fly in Babe) to lubricious commercials (Manikin cigars in the 1970s) and soft porn (Sexy Sonia: Leaves from my Schoolgirl Notebook).

Margolyes was funny and phlegmatic on Desert Island Discs, but there was something profoundly sad about it, too. “I’m not happy with what I’ve given to the world,” she told Kirsty Young. “I think I’m underused, undervalued and slightly despised. I wanted to do Shakespeare, be at the National, admired as an actress. But at the moment I’m just smiled at as an actress. I want to hurt and astonish as an actress.” She said if she was lucky, she could stretch her career for another 10 years.

That was 15 years ago. Today, she has never been so popular and in a way she never expected to be – as a personality, with multiple new audiences. And it probably all started with the Graham Norton story. Not only did she become a desirable (if high-risk) chatshow guest, she was invited to make documentaries. Over the past five years she has made TV series about Britain’s obesity problem and her own weight struggles, confronting her fear of ageing and dying, and taking road trips through America, Australia and Scotland.

I remind her that she was a model citizen on Desert Island Discs. “Well, I wouldn’t swear on Radio 4! That would be terrible.” She says her parents would have been horrified. Although long gone, they continue to play a huge part in her life. For all her rabble-rousing and dirty talk, she remains desperate to please them. “I had wonderful parents, and they have never let me go and I have allowed them not to let me go.” Is that why she still observes so many Jewish traditions? “Oh yes! It would please them. And I didn’t please them by being a lesbian. I didn’t give them grandchildren. They wanted the whole schmear , the traditional stuff.” When she was 27, she realised she was gay. Soon after, she started dating the Australian academic Heather Sutherland and came out to her mother who was devastated. Today, she says she wishes she’d never told her. She and Heather, a history professor, have been together for 54 years.

Strictly speaking, it’s not true that Margolyes would never swear on Radio 4. But to be fair, on the occasion she did , she was unaware she was still on air. Last October, she appeared on the Today programme to pay tribute to Robbie Coltrane, who had just died. On her way out, she said, “I never thought I’d be sitting in the seat … ” Presenter Justin Webb finished for her: “In the seat Jeremy Hunt has just sat in, you were about to say!” But he was wrong. “When I saw him there, I said, ‘You’ve got a hell of a job, best of luck.’ What I really wanted to say was, ‘ Fuck you, you bastard’ but you can’t say that.” She was quickly ushered out, with apologies to listeners.

For me, it was one of her greatest performances because it was spontaneous. On chatshows, she’s there to outrage, but there was nothing planned about this. I expect her to revel in the memory, but she looks sickened. “I didn’t know I was on mic. I nearly shat myself when I found out. I was practically in tears. The girl who showed me to my car will tell you. I was shaking with shock. Because I would not swear on Radio 4.”

It gave lots of us pleasure, I say, because it was from the heart. “It was from the heart because I said what I felt, but it was a bit of a shock. The producers were delightful about it and that made me feel better because I’m not trying to offend people, I’m trying to change people’s minds, to make them see that the sort of thing going on in parliament and Israel and America is not acceptable. I’m angry and I think other people should be angry, and that’s why I behave like that. Actually I’m an incredibly moral and well-behaved person in public with other people. I don’t want to embarrass and upset people. That’s absolutely not my agenda.”

M argolyes is Zooming from Broken Hill, a mining town in New South Wales (she has dual citizenship of Britain and Australia) where she’s making another documentary series – though it’s all hush-hush. Zoom seems to make her personality even bigger, if that’s possible. She’s right here in my living room demanding to know everything, and answering with unsparing honesty. She takes one look at me and smiles. “Are you Jewish ?” I am, as it happens. “Where are you?” In north London, I say. And she’s off. Margolyes loves to talk about her Judaism – how important the traditions are for her, how she never works on Yom Kippur and how fellow Jews regard her as a heretic because she is so critical of Israel. “I think north London Jews feel I should keep my mouth shut and that I am a terrorist.” In Oh Miriam! she says the living person she most despises is Israeli prime minister Benjamin Netanyahu for “fanning the flames of conflict between Israelis and Palestinians, and removing the chance of peace”.

Margolyes grew up in Oxford, the only child of a Scottish doctor and a mother who was artistic and let out flats to students (Margolyes did the cleaning). She says she was spoiled to bits – not materially, but with love. “My parents loved me beyond any love you can imagine. It made me a bit conceited, but it taught me to expect love from everyone.” She attended the prestigious Oxford High school and graduated from Cambridge with a degree in English. At university, she performed in the 1962 Footlights show, alongside future members of Monty Python and the Goodies. As the only girl in the show, she says they treated her with contempt. “They sent me to Coventry. I would go on stage, get the laughs, then I’d come off and was completely ignored.” Did she ask why they behaved like that? “No, I was too crushed. I think they thought I was too full of myself because in those days women were literally not allowed to join the club. Graham Chapman and John Cleese were poisonous. John was a brilliant comedian in his day, but something has turned. Like milk, he’s gone sour. He’s an irrelevance.” She does single out two Pythons for praise, however. “Michael Palin is completely different. He’s a darling, a special man. And Eric Idle is lovely – a friend of mine. He’s incredibly intelligent and very funny. Cleese is a puny tadpole of a person.” Despite this, she loved her time at Cambridge, and says this was when she truly became alive. After university, she moved to London, selling encyclopedias and doing market research for two years before getting a job with the BBC Drama Repertory Company. Since then she’s rarely been without work.

Virtually everything in her life has been shaped out of love for her parents or in opposition to their views, or an unlikely mix of the two. Even her obsession with blowjobs. “Mummy and Daddy said, ‘You behave like a lady, you don’t sleep with people before you’re married’ and, rather like President Clinton, I kept to that.” She looks at me, thoughtfully. “I have a terrible gag reflex when I go to the dentist and sometimes I think that’s the punishment for sucking off.” I tell her I have a theory about her obsession with fellatio – I think you just like saying “sucking off”. She giggles. “Oh yes! It’s funny. Because you can see it happening when you say that. Fellatio could be the name of a road, but sucking off is only sucking off.” She comes to a sudden stop. “I’m just going to fart. That’s it. OK, go ahead.”

M argolyes doesn’t drink and has never taken drugs. “I’m not interested in something you can inhale, take into your body, that changes your mind. I don’t like it.” Is she a prude in some ways? “Oh definitely. Definitely . Someone I recently worked with has a very committed relationship with a woman and he made an assignation, and I was deeply shocked and said so. And everybody thinks, ‘Oh, fuck off, Miriam.’” What kind of assignation? “Well, he met a woman and made a date with her with a view to a horizontal relationship.” Didn’t you cheat on Heather once? “Yes, I did, and I wouldn’t do it again.” It caused huge turmoil, she says. “Don’t gamble with your happiness. Adultery is for fools.”

Margolyes says she’s changed her attitude to lots of things in her life while her parents never did. Can she give an example? “Yes. I moved to the left.” Pause. “And I don’t believe in circumcision. That’s a big thing. I only realised I didn’t like it recently. I don’t like circumcision because you are mutilating a child.” And within a beat, she’s on to smegma. “I don’t think circumcision in itself is a bad thing. In fact it’s probably a good thing because we lose the problem of smegma which is a nightmare for many women.” Like many celebrities, she makes money using the Cameo app, which provides personalised videos for fans. “In my Cameo messages, I often give instructions to young men to pull back their foreskins and give it a good wipe over because it’s very important. But nobody actually seems to say that any more, so I think that’s one of the good things I’ve done in my life; to bring smegma to the forefront of people’s knowledge.”

But, she says, her ambitions extend beyond smegma. She cites her friend Esther Rantzen as somebody who has really made a difference. “Esther founded Childline. She’s created an organisation to challenge loneliness for old people. She’s made a difference to people’s lives. I haven’t done that. I’ve had a lovely time and I’ve made people laugh, I hope, but I’m not sure I’ve got the intellectual fierceness I would like to have.” She says her approach is too scattergun – within a single thought, she can rage against climate change, Brexit, factory farming and “that bastard Rees-Mogg who had the impudence to say the victims of Grenfell lacked common sense”. “The thing is I care about a lot of things, I’m not focused enough on one or two. But I hope to go to Israel and Palestine to make a documentary. Hopefully I’ll be well enough. That will mean I’ve done my duty.”

Margolyes may be struggling physically, but workwise she’s more active than ever. The way you’ve made a difference, I suggest, is as a role model for older people. “Well, that’s good. I’m not exactly vain, but I don’t like the look of myself on television. That’s why I never watch myself. And when I was doing this documentary in Australia, I said to my brilliant director, Helen Barrow, ‘Don’t film me going upstairs with sticks and making a mess of it, I don’t want people to see me looking like that.’ And she said, ‘Well, you should, Miriam, because it gives people confidence that if you look like that and you can still do it, then they can.’”

But she is struggling to come to terms with her increasing frailty. “I do feel a waning of powers. I’ve got spinal stenosis so I can’t walk properly, and many of my dear friends have died, so I’m conscious of time running out. And that makes me slightly hysterical at times because I want to try to do the things I have to do.” At the moment, someone from the documentary team is staying with her to help look after her. “I’m afraid of losing my physical independence. My feeling of disablement has made me make more demands because I get frightened. And that is a new thing. I was afraid of failure before. Getting bad reviews or not being employed. I think all actors have that. But now there is this extra anxiety. The thing that scares the shit out of me is that I might have a stroke because my mother had one and I saw what it did.” Does it scare her more than death? “Yes, and I’m irritated that I should be afraid. Why can’t I just go through and whatever happens, happens? Because you can’t do much about it.”

after newsletter promotion

One of the things she’d most like to do now is live with Heather on a permanent basis. Despite being together for 54 years, they have never done so. In 1973, she bought a home in Tuscany. “And that’s where I want to end up with the person of my life, together.” But because of Brexit, they can’t do so. “One of the reasons I hate Boris Johnson so much is because he’s fucked about with my life. Brexit means we can’t be in the house I bought 50 years ago for longer than 90 days in every 180. Brexit is an appalling catastrophe. A deliberate appalling catastrophe for which the Tories should fry in hell.”

Is Heather very different from her? “Ah, completely,” she says proudly. “She’s grown-up and ironic and watchful and quiet. And she does not like to be talked about.” Margolyes used to see a therapist who told her she was basically a five-year-old but with a bit of work she could mature into a 12-year-old. Did she succeed? “She said when we stopped, ‘I think you have made it to 12, but you might need top-ups.’” Has she had them? “Sadly no, because she died not long afterwards.” Does Heather bring out the little girl in her? “No, I’m more grown-up with Heather because she won’t have it if I’m not. She’s tough and she’s good for me. I’m a little afraid of her in some ways.” In what way won’t she have it? “All the attributes that are self-regarding she simply withdraws from. She’s just not going to play that game.”

What does she love about you? For once Margolyes is reduced to silence. “I’m lovable,” she eventually says. “That’s what she loves. The bit of me that is vulnerable and kind and intelligent and funny.”

In Oh Miriam! (so called because she’s heard it said so many times), she makes it clear she has more time for women than men: “Most men are arseholes – not all, and the young ones are better.” She describes Boris Johnson’s father Stanley as “the worst old person I know … a complete arsehole”. Why? “I had to live with him for a week in a programme called The Real Marigold on Tour . We went to St Petersburg. Sheila Ferguson, Wayne Sleep and the wonderful Bobby George who is a Tory, a working-class Tory, but a diamond.” She stops to congratulate herself on her tolerance. “I think what’s good about me is I can see beyond the fact that he’s a Tory to the goodness of the man.” And Stanley Johnson? “It was a real eye-opener that he could be as rude, as scornful, as selfish as he was. He was utterly disgusting and shameful, and I have no qualms about saying so.”

Nor does she have any qualms about naming the other men who have behaved badly in her presence. Take Warren Beatty. She briefly appeared in his 1981 film Reds, and claims of the first time they met: “He was sitting at his desk and I was standing in the doorway. He looked me up and down and said, ‘Do you fuck?’ I wasn’t having any of that, so I shot back, ‘Yes, but not you.’” Did she regard it as an abuse of his power? “Well, I don’t think he should do it, but men are like that. If they have a chance to have a fuck, they will. I think he’s probably done it to everybody who’s walked through the door.”

In 2004, she appeared with Beatty’s wife, Annette Bening, in the film Being Julia. Did she tell her what she thought of Beatty? “Oh, of course I did! I can’t remember exactly what I said. I probably said he was a bit of a pillock. But when he came to visit Annette, they invited me to supper with the family, and their relationship seemed to be gorgeous. She’s a terrific person.”

Mick Jagger also gets a dishonourable mention in the book. In 2001 she appeared on stage with his then girlfriend Sophie Dahl in The Vagina Monologues, and Jagger would visit her at the theatre. “He used to come backstage and he was just a miserable cunt. He was unfriendly, and I don’t think he treated her very well. He was much older than her and I thought he was up himself. I never listen to that kind of music anyway. I’m a musical snob, so I wasn’t impressed by him.”

Then there’s Arnold Schwarzenegger, with whom she made the movie End of Days. She says he was so offended at her letting slip a fart in rehearsals that when they were filming her death scene, as he had her pinned underneath him, he “farted, loudly, purposefully and malevolently, directly into my face – and then laughed uproariously”. She wasn’t impressed, and claims: “He was a privileged groper. Not to me because he didn’t fancy me, and I don’t think he liked me. He’s a very boring man.” (Schwarzenegger apologised this year over historical accusations that he had groped women.)

Finally, there’s the comedy actor Leonard Rossiter, with whom who she sat on the council of the performers’ trade union Equity, giving her “first-hand experience of what a horrible man he was. He was a pig. A brilliant actor, but he was absurdly racist, absurdly rightwing, and he was personally rude to people.”

But, she says, she has worked with so many people she loved, many of them now dead. Who does she miss most? She mentions Roger Hammond (who appeared with her in the TV adaptation of Dickens’ Little Dorrit) and Sonia Fraser (who co-wrote Dickens’ Women with Margolyes, as well as directing her in the one-woman show in which she plays 23 characters). “She was my mentor and teacher. I also miss Ken Dodd very much. He was a genius, an intellectual in a way, and very human. He loved connecting to people. I miss Barry Humphries. He was extraordinary, and I knew him from when I was 17, before the greatness. I really do miss him.”

We talk about the self-lacerating assessment she gave of her career on Desert Island Discs 15 years ago – undervalued, underused, despised. “That was quite a long time ago,” she says quietly. Has she changed her mind? “Yes, I don’t think I’m despised. Underused? I think that’s still true. Undervalued? I think people think more of me now than they did then, but I don’t think I’m admired as an actress. I didn’t make it as an actress in the way I would have liked and think I could have. I don’t think I think I have great talent, and I allowed myself to remain fat, and that meant I was hard to cast.” Was that the main thing that held her back? “I don’t know. Look, I’m a funny-looking woman. I really am.”

She’s not thrilled that she’s probably best known as an actor for the Harry Potter films. “Harry Potter has dominated quite a lot of my life latterly and I’m always at pains to say I’ve never read any of the books or seen the films. I fell asleep when I went to the premiere of the two I was in. I’m just not interested in fantasy. I’m bored by it. But I think JK Rowling’s a bloody good writer. If you read the detective stories, they’re fabulous.”

Having said that, she’s hardly complaining. Her career has provided a good living and she is amazed how things have worked out for her in recent years. In June, she was the cover star of Vogue – posing naked, but for a few discreetly placed iced cherry buns. “That is where I was humbled. I could not believe that I was going to be on the cover of Vogue. Not a magazine I particularly respect, or read, but to be on the cover! I can’t ask for much more than I have. The affection with which people greet me is astonishing. I’m puzzled why I should suddenly have become famous and wherever I go people rush at me and say, ‘Oh my God, it’s you , I love you!’” Did people ever say that before? “No, it’s new!” She quotes Gertrude Stein who, when asked what a writer most wants, replied, “Oh, praise, praise, praise, praise, praise.” That’s what she’s wanted, too, Margolyes says . Has getting it made her more content? “Ooh yes! When people come up to you and they’re pleased just to be in your company, well, that’s a wonderful thing.”

• Miriam Margolyes

Comments (…)

Most viewed.

Friday 5th July 2024

Miriam Margolyes

TICKETS ON SALE AT 15 Dec 2023 10:00am

After the success of her sell-out 2023 tour, Miriam Margolyes returns with more, juicy, jaw-dropping stories from her eventful life and career to celebrate the paperback release of her bestselling book, Oh Miriam! Stories from an Extraordinary Life. Buckle up for an irrepressible, hilarious and moving evening as Miriam shares some of her favourite anecdotes and divulges never-told-before stories.

Every ticket comes with a paperback copy of ‘Oh Miriam! RRP £10.99

Stay up to date with notifications from The Independent

Notifications can be managed in browser preferences.

UK Edition Change

• UK Politics
• News Videos
• Paris 2024 Olympics
• Rugby Union
• Sport Videos
• John Rentoul
• Mary Dejevsky
• Andrew Grice
• Sean O’Grady
• Photography
• Theatre & Dance
• Culture Videos
• Food & Drink
• Health & Families
• Royal Family
• Electric Vehicles
• Car Insurance deals
• Lifestyle Videos
• UK Hotel Reviews
• News & Advice
• Simon Calder
• Australia & New Zealand
• South America
• C. America & Caribbean
• Middle East
• Politics Explained
• News Analysis
• Today’s Edition
• Home & Garden
• Broadband deals
• Fashion & Beauty
• Travel & Outdoors
• Sports & Fitness
• Sustainable Living
• Climate Videos
• Solar Panels
• Behind The Headlines
• On The Ground
• Decomplicated
• You Ask The Questions
• Binge Watch
• Travel Smart
• Watch on your TV
• Crosswords & Puzzles
• Most Commented
• Newsletters
• Ask Me Anything
• Virtual Events
• Betting Sites
• Online Casinos
• Wine Offers

Thank you for registering

Please refresh the page or navigate to another page on the site to be automatically logged in Please refresh your browser to be logged in

11 biggest revelations from Miriam Margolyes’ hilarious new memoir

From her most-despised famous people to her encounters with ‘smug’ mick jagger and ‘horrid’ steve martin, article bookmarked.

Find your bookmarks in your Independent Premium section, under my profile

Get our free weekly email for all the latest cinematic news from our film critic Clarisse Loughrey

Get our the life cinematic email for free, thanks for signing up to the the life cinematic email.

Miriam Margolyes , the actor famed for Harry Potter , The Age of Innocence and her supremely entertaining chat show appearances, has released a new memoir: Oh Miriam: Stories from an Extraordinary Life.

Margolyes, who has increasingly become known for her candid anecdotes during her TV interviews, has not held back in the book, which is out now.

From naming the people she “loathes the most in the world” to her encounter with the “horrid Steve Martin ” and the “smug” Mick Jagger , below are the 11 biggest revelations from the memoir.

1. Margolyes says she is now mostly unable to do theatre as she is “semi-crippled”

Margolyes describes herself as” semi-crippled” in the new memoir, adding: “Usually that means you have to stop. And I don’t think I can do theatre again unless I’m playing a character similarly disabled.” I know Maggie [Smith] and Eileen [Atkins] and Judi [Dench] and Vanessa [Redgrave] still tread the boards, and they’re older than me – but they’re fitter, bugger it, and good luck to them!” But Margolyes says she has told her agent to tell casting directors that she is still available.

• Miriam Margolyes joins Doctor Who cast as classic alien character
• Miriam Margolyes scathingly criticises ‘poisonous’ John Cleese
• Mrs Tiggy-Winkle or tour de farce? The mystery of the eternally naughty Miriam Margolyes

2. Margolyes names her most-despised people ever

In the memoir, Margolyes names Israeli president Benjamin Netanyahu as the “living person” she “most despises”. She writes: “The decline of decency, honesty and justice in the world during my lifetime has been inexorable. And the nastiest of the current nasties is the Israeli prime minister, who should be in jail for breach of trust, accepting bribes, and fraud.” Explaining her reasoning, she continues: “The crime of his recent attempts to control judges in Israel is the most egregious. He is fanning the flames of conflict between Israelis and Palestinians and removing the chance of peace between them.” Elsewhere, Margolyes writes that “there is no shortage of candidates for my Despised List”, adding that the other people she “loathes most in the world” are Vladimir Putin, Nigel Farage, Boris Johnson and David Cameron.

3. Margolyes calls out Warren Beatty for on-set habit

Margolyes says that, after she was cast by Warren Beatty in 1981 film Reds , she took it upon herself to call the actor-director out for his “irritating habit of filming” people “without warning”. She writes: “I challenged him on it. He said, ‘I’m sorry, I don’t have time to prepare people. If I want to take a quick shot, I say their name, and they must be able to act straight away.’ I found that rude and inconsiderate and I told him so. He stopped doing it, so I think he understood, but he was definitely irked. He’s not somebody I would call the mother of the company. The motherf***er of the company maybe.”

4. Margolyes flashed Martin Scorsese on Age of Innocence set

Margolyes reveals she once flashed a tired Martin Scorsese after one particularly long morning on the set of his 1993 film The Age of Innocence . Margolyes says that after seeing crew members’ faces “lined with fatigue”, she “felt it was my duty to raise their spirits”. Consequently, she “fell back on my well-tried remedy for the flagging male – and female”. The actor writes: “And without further ado, I pulled up my maroon ‘Dickens’ Universe’ T-shirt and my proud and thrusting breasts, released from any confining brassiere cascaded out of my clothes, in a snowy Victoria Falls of mammarial magnificence.” She says Scorsese and the assembled crew’s reaction was a “stunned” and “dazed silence”, which quickly turned “into roars of laughter” and ultimately, according to Margolyes, “gratitude”. Margolyes says Scorsese “has never forgotten” the memory, stating: “Many years later, he said to me, ‘I remember that hair and make-up parade most particularly.’”

5. Margolyes says Kenneth Branagh “sacked” everyone on set of his first film

After being offered a role in Mike Newell’s 1979 directorial debut The Awakening , Margolyes says she “accepted like a shot” – but “knew he’d cast me because I was a friend and friends are needed on a film set”. The actor claims this was a lesson learnt by Kenneth Branagh while he filmed Dead Again (1991), which Margolyes had an uncredited role in. According to Margolyes, she was “flabbergasted” when Branagh went “nuclear” and “sacked” the whole crew working on the film after they “refused to do anything he told them to do”.

6. Margolyes says working with Steve Martin was “horrid”

In the book, Margolyes reflects on the “uncomfortable” experience of working with Martin on Frank Oz’s cult hit Little Shop of Horrors , which was released in 1986. Margolyes, 83, played the secretary to Martin’s “psychopathic dentist” Orin Scrivello in the film and, in their musical number “Dentist!”, Margolyes is punched by Martin’s character, who also slams a door into her face. Margolyes suggests she was hurt for real while filming the scenes, writing: “I was hit all day by doors opening in my face; repeatedly punched, slapped and knocked down by an unlovely and unapologetic Steve Martin – perhaps he was method acting – and came home grumpy with a splitting headache.” She adds, “Let it not be said that I have never suffered in the name of art,” concluding that the actor “was undeniably brilliant, but horrid to me”.

Watch Apple TV+ free for 7 days

New subscribers only. £8.99/mo. after free trial. Plan auto-renews until cancelled

7. Margolyes felt “terrible” after swearing about Jeremy Hunt on BBC Radio 4

She reflects on the blunder that saw her swear on BBC Radio 4 in October 2022. Without realising she was still live on-air, Margolyes said of Jeremy Hunt, whom she encountered as he was leaving the studio: “When I saw him there I just said, ‘You’ve got a hell of a job – best of luck,’ but what I really wanted to say was, ‘F*** you, you bastard.’” Margolyes says in the book that she was “overcome with horror” over the “terrible” moment, writing: “I was still shaking, because it’s an unforgivable blunder to utter such words on the nation’s main morning programme – and I felt I’d let myself and Radio 4 down.” She adds that she “felt ashamed about it until the producers sent me flowers to comfort me” even though she “thought they’d be furious”. Margolyes describes the blunder as “a reminder that sometimes you do need to button yourself up”.

8. Margolyes calls Mick Jagger a “smug c***”

Margolyes says that she encountered Rolling Stones frontman Mick Jagger after working with his ex Sophie Dahl in a 2001 production of The Vagina Monologues . “Every evening, Mick Jagger would pick her up at the stage door, looking like a debauched 57-year-old angel in tight jeans, his face perpetually grumpy,” she writes, adding: “I’d never had much time for Mick Jagger but Sophie loved him so desperately that Siân [Phillips] and I worried about her. She may have been voicing a vagina in the production but if anything, he was the c***. He was always so smug and a smug c*** is such a turn-off.”

9. Margolyes recalls falling in love with Vanessa Redgrave

According to Margolyes, Vanessa Redgrave, while rehearsing Orpheus Descending in 1988, delivered “the single most extraordinary piece of acting I’ve ever seen”. The actor says she developed “a schoolgirl crush” on Redgrave, writing: “I was ‘cracked’ on her just like being back at Oxford High School. By the last night, I had to say something. I couldn’t let the production end without letting her know. Just after the final curtain call, as we were all going off stage together, I blurted it out: ‘You know I’ve fallen in love with you, Vanessa?’ She stopped dead, looked intently into my eyes and smiled sweetly and very tenderly at me. And then she said, ‘But why did you wait till the last night to tell me?’”

10. Margolyes “feels sad” about the Phillip Schofield controversy

Margolyes says that she enjoys appearing on morning shows as “egos are less in evidence”, and name-checked This Morning as one she “particularly enjoyed”. The actor says hosts Holly Willoughby and Phillip Schofield “were warm, welcoming and ready to join in the frolic” when she appeared on the series as their Agony Aunt. Addressing Schofield’s decision to quit after admitting to lying about an affair with a younger male colleague, Margolyes adds: “I feel sad I shan’t have the chance to make Phil laugh again; he was a darling then and to me he always will be.”

11. Margolyes “regrets” Matthew Perry exchange on The Graham Norton Show

Margolyes reflects on appearing on The Graham Norton Show alongside Friends star Matthew Perry while having “no idea who he was”. She writes: “Matthew was expecting a bland conversation that stayed on the surface of things, but I was warming to my theme and immediately launched in, burrowing deeper. I asked him if he was an alcoholic. On reflection, I really wish I hadn’t.” She says that particular chat show episode “was one of the few times” she “didn’t quite ‘mesh’ with another guest”.

Oh Miriam: Stories from an Extraordinary Life is out now.

Join our commenting forum

Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies

Subscribe to Independent Premium to bookmark this article

Want to bookmark your favourite articles and stories to read or reference later? Start your Independent Premium subscription today.

New to The Independent?

Or if you would prefer:

Want an ad-free experience?

Hi {{indy.fullName}}

• My Independent Premium
• Account details
• Help centre